Arggghhhhhhhh! It’s Facial Laser Hair Removal time again. If I’m being honest, I am nervous, but not like last time. I cut myself shaving again, as I always do, so those cuts will most likely add to the pain. Wahoo lol I haven’t had the best of times lately, I’m in a pretty depressed place and just looking forward to seeing my gender therapist again. The upside is, I haven’t had time to focus on the pain of today’s session. So least there is a bright side to this bout of depression :)

My facial hair has really started to go a lot more than I expected. Very impressive for only one session. My grey hairs really pop now though, due to the lack of black hairs around them. Doh! Today for instance, when I shaved, the sink was full mostly of ginger and grey hairs, both of which the laser can’t remove. I hadn’t shaved for four weeks, I looked a bit like a tramp, but I was intrigued to see how much hair would grow. You can see for yourself in the images below.


The first photo shows just how much hair was falling out around 14 days after the first session. So much hair, it was actually exciting. If I lightly caressed my face, hair would just drop into my hand. I got slightly addicted to it actually, strangely satisfying, like when you start peeling your skin after sun bathing :)

Photo two shows a comparison of around three weeks hair growth, before and after the first session. So the top half shows three weeks of facial hair growth before any treatment, the bottom half shows three weeks of hair growth after the first session. While I still have a lot of hair, so much has gone. I would say around 40%, maybe a bit more.


Debbie, the lady who does my facial hair treatment, was really nice today. She asked about Christmas, and I started crying. I explained how I’m struggling at the moment. She said she would contact the gender clinic if I wanted. I said it’s ok, I’ve been talking to my therapist, but Debbie really helped today, saying I don’t have to suffer in silence. Multiple times she seemed really caring, at one point even rubbing my face with a towel, “Look, I’m looking after you like your mother now,” she said lol

As for the session. She felt my face and said she was very impressed with the smoothness, and that I was ready for a test patch with the new, more aggressive laser. She tested three settings, low, medium and high. It didn’t hurt as much, but it still had that strange painful feeling I can’t quite explain. It’s such an odd feeling, very unpleasant. She was right though, it didn’t seem to be as painful. The plan is to move over to this new laser from the next session onwards, as there will be less hairs to treat.


The session got underway with the original laser, and it still hurt. Not like last time thank goodness. Last time I would say the pain hit peaks of around 9 or 10, this time it was more like 8 or 9. For the most part, the pain was around level 6 or so. It hurt the most on my top lip, chin and jaw. I asked why does my jaw line hurt so much, she said it’s because the bone is closest to the skin so the laser is hitting the bone.

Bloody hurts whatever’s going on. She could also see me in discomfort while zapping my chin.

“Do you want to take a break?” she asked.
“NO!” I quickly and aggressively snapped.
“Oww, ok, get it over with. I see,” she said lol

It made me laugh, and I said sorry, I didn’t mean to be so snappy but while you’re in this hot seat, I swear you just want it over as quickly as possible. I would rather get it done in one hit, and thankfully, before I knew it she was done. Phew! I had one of my earphones in with my trance music playing like last time, and again, focusing on the music while she’s doing this really helps. She did say I handled it a lot better this time too.

There was no chanting this time, but I was humming a lot. I thought if I keep humming it won’t hurt. Hum hum hummm … Argh ya bastard … I found out humming doesn’t work lol

Something really cool happened while she was doing this though. Over Christmas I saw a little Robin at Saltrum, well, while she was doing the treatment he popped into my head and I saw him dancing to my music lol It was so cool. So cool, I even felt a little teary for him. Yes, I am emotional at the moment. Least I can blame the hormones :)

I cried again the next day, as Debbie was so nice, she rang me up to make sure I was feeling ok and to ask if I’d contacted the gender clinic. I felt so much kindness from her, it was really nice, and in fact, this one little phone call helped me get out of my depression.

Thank you Debbie.

I returned for my third session on the 2nd of February 2017, where f-bombs were dropped!


– Satoru Fujinuma